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Here’s the post-race presser from the Monaco Grand Prix. As much as we’d like Lewis and Nico to maintain perspective the media needs to take a chill pill too, with this whole teammate saga they’re trying to manufacture.

While you can’t read body language or tone of voice into this transcript, the two Mercedes drivers seemed to be as cordial as you can expect, despite some very obvious needling from the press.

Nico Rosberg won his second Monaco Grand Prix in succession overnight with a pole to flag victory that impressed everyone except his teammate Lewis Hamilton.

The Mercedes pair finished one-two yet again and for the most part enjoyed clear air to their inferiors fighting for third place. The form guide remained consistent with Daniel Ricciardo the best of the rest and for the last few laps he was right on Hamilton’s tail but as you night expect on the tight streets of Monte Carlo he was unable to find a way past.

Fernando Alonso managed to somehow find a space between P3 and P5 that meant he barely saw anyone else on track. It’s pretty hard to be unnoticed on this track, but Fernando managed to do that. He’s now gone 20 races without a win, his longest dry spell in the red team.

The so far unflattering return to Ferrari for Kimi Raikkonen looked set for some champagne after he made a banzai start from P6 and found himself in P4 at the first turn and P3 not long after. Alas for the Finn his race went south after the first pit stop when he suffered a puncture and was forced back in almost immediately for new tyres. His next highlight was gently stuffing his car into the tyres at Loews hairpin while attempting to pass Kevin Magnussen. Aside from inconvenience and pride no serious damage was done and he was able to continue on his not so merry way to P12, after a quick stop for a new nose cone.

Sebastian Vettel made a great start, too, and was quickly past Ricciardo, pushing his teammate down to P5. Soon, though, Vettel would be crying into his beer after the engine in his RB10 got hungry for cylinders. It sounded very rough and Vettel’s mood was not helped by seeing how many cars could pass him on a single lap and his race soon came to an inevitable conclusion.

Aside from that the race was a typical Monaco affair. Lots of attrition and the highlight was Jules Bianchi who picked up a couple of points for finishing ninth. He finished eighth on track, but didn’t line up on the grid correctly and was given a five second penalty. No matter, both he and Marussia were overjoyed at earning their first points in Formula 1.

The narrative for the immediate future in Formula 1 is going to be the rift between Rosberg and Hamilton, real or imagined. While understanding how desperate both men are to fight for the championship we’d like to think that both could keep a healthy dose of persepctive and enjoy the position of privilege they are in and find it within themselves to smile from time to time when they don’t get the chocolates.

Nico Rosberg will start the Monaco Grand Prix from pole position for the second year running following a dramatic qualifying session. He’ll start alongside his Mercedes AMG teammate, Lewis Hamilton, before further team pairings of Daniel Riccardo and Sebastian Vettel (Red Bull) on row two and Fernando Alonso and Kimi Raikkonen (Ferrari) claiming row three.

Rosberg set the fastest time (1:15.989) on his first run in Q3, a mere 0.59s faster than Hamilton’s best. The 2013 Monaco winner was the first of the front runners to start his second run and a lock up heading into Mirrabeau sent him down the escape road to avoid crashing into the tyre wall. That incident brought out local yellow flags meaning anyone behind had to slow through that corner leaving their second attempts thwarted.

The consipiracy theorists were quick to point out that with provisional pole already safe, and the fact that nine out of the last 10 Monaco Grands Prix have been won by the polesitter, that Rosberg had more to lose than he could gain and that his effect on the rest of the field may not have been so innocent.

A theory given oxygen by Lewis Hamilton’s icy claim in the post-quali press conference that he was “up a couple of tenths” on his final attempt at pole.

There was enough hot air in the sabotage theory to see the race stewards launch an official investigation before surmising, “The stewards examined video and telemetry data from the team and FIA and could find no evidence of any offence related to the turn 5 incident.”

We all know that Formula 1 can be a soap opera at times and the level of discussion heard following Rosberg’s innocent mistake and Hamilton’s churlish reaction is perfect proof of that.

Yet the mug punter sitting at home on the couch is the big winner, because tonight’s race is shaping up as an absolute ball tearer. Factor in the chance of some light rain on the streets of Monte Carlo and it’s pretty easy to state the race will be compulsory viewing.